This last week has seen a veil lifted from the culture of silence surrounding males who are the victims of bullying, violent mob attacks and sexual assault.
The recent reports on the illicit student activities at St. Michaelsa国际传媒檚 boys school in Toronto reminds us all to talk to our kids about being open and honest as to whatsa国际传媒檚 going on in their lives, and keep the conversations going.
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Itsa国际传媒檚 been reported that charges of assault, gang sexual assault, and assault with a weapon have been laid against six students, aged 14-15 years old. These alleged assaults against fellow classmates came to light as video was uploaded to social media.Theres absolutely no spin you can put on this story to make it OK. Itsa国际传媒檚 not about boys being boys, itsa国际传媒檚 not about tradition, and/or hazing. Itsa国际传媒檚 brutal back-room savagery perpetrated in secret against the defenseless and fraught with threat and fear.
It breaks my heart for those vulnerable young men who just wanted to be accepted, but ended up hurt and broken. Theresa国际传媒檚 also a lot we can learn from the current happenings and itsa国际传媒檚 important to share them with the younger people in your life.
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First and foremost, you have a voice. Never be silent. This is so important. If you witness something, tell someone. A parent, a teacher, Auntie sa国际传媒� someone. Theysa国际传媒檒l assist and help make decisions. A burden is much lighter when shared.
How sad is it that in the St. Michael incident, there were onlookers when someone was being assaulted. It wasnsa国际传媒檛 an isolated incident as there are several videos surfacing. I wonder about the young person who took the video. Did he take it as a way of telling the truth or was the thing just a spectacle or joke to share. Perhaps he was so thankful it wasnsa国际传媒檛 him being victimized that hesa国际传媒檇 forgotten the seriousness of what had just occurred. Either way, if you standby and do nothing, yousa国际传媒檙e complicit in the illegal behaviour and will be part of the criminal investigation, including having to testify as a witness. sa国际传媒�
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The incident above was discovered by the school administration because someone uploaded the video to social media. I spoke with RCMP Const. Dan Moskaluk about the sharing of explicit pictures or video and he states sa国际传媒渘ot distributing the material is the first action of being against it.sa国际传媒�
In regards to sharing, he further states, sa国际传媒渋f you receive any such material, you should consider reporting it to authorities, or a trusted adult and delete it. Do not, I repeat, do not share it. This could result in charges of distribution of child pornography which is a Criminal Code offense. You donsa国际传媒檛 want to go there. Put yourself in their shoes,sa国际传媒� he further states. sa国际传媒淚magine if someone were sending pictures of you all over social media. Stop and think. Do the best to affect a positive change and, in this case, that is to never sa国际传媒� repeat sa国际传媒� never share any digital images like that.sa国际传媒�
These lessons need to be discussed over and over again.
sa国际传媒淲hen kids are in the car, theysa国际传媒檙e a captive audience,sa国际传媒� says Moskaluk.sa国际传媒淚tsa国际传媒檚 a great time to reinforce things like donsa国际传媒檛 ever send sexual digital images, or itsa国际传媒檚 not OK to watch people get hurt and not act. Even when teens get their learners license, they need a parent in the car, so just keep talking. Keep repeating. It will get through to them.sa国际传媒�
Action brings change and I would hope someday that the type of behaviour discussed today will be a thing of the past. Former students at St. Michaelsa国际传媒檚, now adult men, have come forward to say that the same thing happened to them many years ago. Bravo to those men whosa国际传媒檝e stepped forward. When the culture of silence is uncovered, the power shifts. Itsa国际传媒檚 time.
Unfortunately the lessons in life came too late for some of the current students of St. Michaelsa国际传媒檚 but I hope the move is now toward honesty, safety and an open forum of reporting and discussing. Having young people in jail doesnsa国际传媒檛 solve the issue of the narsassistic behaviour thatsa国际传媒檚 learned and maintained through a foundation of power built on secrecy and the fear of others. As Moskaluk says, sa国际传媒淐hange happens when people themselves affect the change by taking a stand.sa国际传媒�
Please share this with young people. Make them aware. Remind them that sharing any type of sexual digital image that they receive could have them charged with distribution of child pornography. Repeat.
Faye Arcand is a freelance writer living in the south Okanagan. She can be reached at faye.arcand@icloud.com or .
